Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Bent Brewstillery Dark Fatha American Emperical Stout


Bent Brewstillery Dark Fatha American Empirical Stout. (whatever that means). Brewed in Minnesota, brewed and bottled by Bent Brewstillery, Roseville, MN. Est. 2012. Alc. 9.3% by Vol, 57 IBU. SRM 60.

The label depicts Darth Vader in a pimp suit. Cute gag, but not sure of the point. Dark beer. Dark Lord of the Sith. Purple robes and chain, feathered hats…something got skipped.

It's solid blackness, that's for sure. Richly roasted tan head, lush and plush.

Aroma: many flavors unfolding. Molasses. Espresso. Cocoa nibs. Some anise. Dark rum. Nice.

Taste: Arrives rather cool on the palate, delivering dark fruit flavors, rich malt character, dry chocolate and coffee notes. Sweetness always held in check, kept at bay, nicely dry. I'd have to say medium-bodied, for it just isn't as full as we'd want from an Imperial Stout. But, no, this is an "Emperical Stout", which has to mean something. It's flavorful, and the alcohol has started to ring in for real and for true. It's like an Imperial Stout that doesn't want to go all the way. It's pussied out. Maybe there's a reason for not doing an Imperial Stout right?

Maybe it's on the label? "This distinctive hybrid beer style combines the crisp, clean feel of a light ale with the dark cocoa roasted smoothness of a stout."

With all due respect, that's one of the dumbest things I've read on a bottle of booze in a long time. Compared to a true Russian Imperial Stout, it's a dismal failure. Compared to this hybrid style nobody asked for, this American Emperical Stout, well, it's crashing success. I guess.

Me, I'm left feeling dull and deadening. All of the alcohol and none of the fun. I need the richness and fullness for a beer this boozy. Seriously, who asked for a hybrid of light and strong? Makes no sense. A poor decision.

Like having Darth Vader carry balloons in his hand and speak like Daffy Duck.
Or making Greedo shoot first. This one is weak with the force.

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