Pour Decisions Maroon & Bold DIPA

Pour Decisions Maroon & Bold Double Infuriating Passive Aggressive Ale. 9.0% ABV.

Appearance: dense and opaque, cast in a magenta hue, tight off-white ring atop.

Aroma: …getting some hoppiness, here, rather indistinct, though, and swiftly swallowed up by malt. Fruit notes. Not much else. hm.

Taste: A crashing wave of big hoppiness splashes the palate, matched at once with massive malt. This is that kind of "DIPA", then, the one that doubles up doubly, giving us twice the hops and twice the malt, making for one fierce and formidable brew. Nearing barley-wine territory.

Lots of fruit notes bouncing around in this, blueberry, raspberry, cherries galore. Not your typical DIPA profile. It lacks the bitterness you'd yearn for in a DIPA, but provides plenty of other hoppy delights. Citrus notes are smothered by the massive malt.
Sweet malt kept well in check, leaves a tasty playing field. Hmm, mmm…not bad.

What's the label tell us? "Expertly crafted from Minnesota-grown hops and Minnesota-malted barley, the 2012 edition of this Infuriatingly Passive Aggressive ale nearly didn't happen. Wind storms. Severe drought. Grasshopper hordes. Mother Nature really wanted to keep us from you your M & B. Toasty malt, spicy citrus and piney hops, with a tannic pithiness running right through the end. Crisp, hoppy, and entirely Minnesotan!" Brewed and bottled by Pour Decision Brewing Company, Roseville, MN.

I don't think it's all that, but it's not bad. But, once again, I don't like when the craftsmen tell me how expertly they crafted it.

The name of this beer suggests that the brewers are alumni of the University of Minnesota, whose colors are maroon and gold. The recommended glassware implies that they are still nostalgic for frat parties.

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Pour Decisions The Scythemen Piwo Grodskie

Pour Decisions The Scythemen Piwo Grodziskie Soecialine (I think).4.0% ABV.  Brewed and bottled by Pour Decisions Brewing Company, Roseville, MN. "Innovating Tradition."
And here we have a collector's item, with the recent news of the merger of PDBC with Bent Brewstillery, a distilling concern which had been sharing the facilities of PDBC. The new name of this joint effort will be …Bent Brewstillery. Did Pour Decisions decide that their name was a poor decision? Hmmm, good question. But, let's drink a beer, already.

First off, this was the first time I'd seen a bottle of PDB for sale, and I grabbed the cheapest bomber. I think this one was eight dollars. Others were 12-18, if memory serves correctly. I picked it up at Elevated Wine & Spirits, which I hadn't visited since last May (through no fault of theirs).

Having poured it, I have to say that I have't seen a less attractive glass of beer in my life. It's an utterly odd coloring for a beer, a weird mixture of pale grey and dull orange. Highly hazed, with a short, but staying head that's just a shade short of cream. The color, though, repels, rather than draws in the eye.

Aroma: sour and strange. But not in any enticing way. What am I getting? Wheat. Sausage. Sauerkraut. Dirty socks. Hey, I'm not trying to be mean here, I'm just struggling with this one. There are so many weird notes, it's really hard to get a handle on. Something like a Berliner Weisse, but damned muddy and mucked-up.

Taste: We're goin' in. …Huh. All that notes from aroma comes plopping on the palate. Strange stuff. They put a sausage in some socks, introduced the funkiest yeast they could find, tossed in some old mashed potatoes and mixed it up. Strained it through a dog blanket and here we have it.

Light-ish body, long-lasting tart twang on the tongue. This may please some of the die-hard sour-heads out there, but I'm having a rough go of it. And I wonder if the gobbledygook on the label will clear things up. Let's read it shall we?

"The Scythemen is our ode to a famous Polish infantry unit who charged Russian cannon fire with nothing more than a straightened scythe. This traditional Grodiskie is an eccentric, hoppy smoked Polish ale made entirely with wheat malt. Mouthfilling smoked, spicy, tannic hops, rich bready wheat, Light and refreshing, yet fully flavorful. A proper drinker for the bravest among us…scythes nor cannons included."

Well, I got a few things right, and in some cases I'm still plain ol' puzzled. I'm not getting the hops at all, although I am picking up on the tannins, just a little bit. And it is refreshing and tart once you get through the sausage and the sauerkraut. Once you get over the terrible look and the odd gumbo of flavors, it's fairly drinkable and partially enjoyable. It's a lot to get over, though.