Three Floyds Barrel-aged Blot Out the Sun Imperial Stout

Three Floyds Barrel-aged Blot Out the Sun Imperial Stout.

10.4 % ABV, 97 IBU. Three Floyds Brewing, Munster, IN. 

Black as the Dark Lord's soul, completely opaque, with a large, rich, roasted tan head. 

In the nose: Bourbon bomb, but the bones of a deep, dark, immense imperial stout stick out. Charcoal, anise, molasses, chocolate, coffee, and the toasted remains of the corpses of your vanquished foes, all holding hands and skipping to and fro ...while the cries and lamentations of their women and children ring loudly throughout the smoldering remains of their once proud land. 

In the mouth: A jolt of sweet malt, vanilla, caramel, toffee, dark fruits, coffee and cocoa.. a mellifluous melange of dark, rich flavors that accompanies the swell of joy you feel when you stride the path of destruction caused by you and your unholy horde, having just laid to waste the formerly glorious Kingdom of Karsh-Allath-Gorg-ku'um, and it's ruler, the Mighty Morgukallal, Merchant of Woe and Sire of the Unholy Bastions of Evil, the Knights of the Despoiling.

Bold and bittersweet, like the feeling you experienced as you silenced the cries of the children of Mighty  Morgukallal with your many-taloned boots, coated thickly with the blood of many conquered enemies, many deserving, none truly innocent. As full as a body can be, as your belly is at the Feast of Devastation, after having eviscerated an entire herd of demon wolves and consumed their bedeviled remains, slowly roasted at the Pit of Righteous Deflowering. 

In other words: Yum. A Dum. Dum. 

"Since the dawn of time it has been mankind’s dream to blot out the sun." -C. Montgomery Burns

(Hey, Three Floyds, hire me to write your label copy, okay? Or the descriptions on your taproom menu, when it reopens...soon, I hope...)